The Last Missive
by Baroness of Slytherin
Summary: Letter from Colonel Tavington to his beloved...only it arrives AFTER he has died...ooo, odd!


'My dear Lady Waltham(Tavington)

Today, I have thought of much I wanted to say to you. But I do not believe I will ever get to speak these thoughts aloud to you...

...you know why.

I hope, at least, you know why?

I am military. You are aristocratic. What is spoken in your circle...

I would not fit in there. I am rough, dangerous and despised by your kind. So be it. Still, the thoughts that I have...they care not for what your kind think or say. Or, believe. They care not.

Everything I have done, will do, I can not undo. What is done, is done and cannot be undone. I cannot be undone.

You know why.

What thoughts have I? Besides the next battle. Besides the next that I conquer. They are of you. They have always been of you. And, will always be of you. And once again, I will never be able to speak them aloud to you. Therefore, I shall write them here, and hope you do not think any less of me for it.

But, it will not matter whether you think less of me, or not. Because by the time you recieve this letter...

You know why.

By the time you read these words...

You know why.

By the time my heart is laid bare on this parchment...

You know why.

I will not exist.

I will no longer look upon you in the same way I have always done. I will no longer see your lovely face, your eyes, your smile...

You know why.

The next battle...

Will be...

And again, you know why.

Before I close this with the words I have longed to speak to you. With the words I desire to whisper to you...in passion or not...we are family...we have been family for so long, that I cannot imagine you being any other then my family. Here I suppose, you will smile and laugh...you know that secret...your father is my...

I will not utter that here. But you know what I mean by this. You have always known, and yet you never gave a second thought to it. And for that, I am grateful. Despite all that you know about me...you have never been afraid...you have accepted me...cared for me...cried for me...

And in a few short days...you will again.

You know why.

One cannot hide from Fate, from their destiny. I would never do so. You know this. I will not fly from my duty to King and Country. I am loyal, as are you. You are too much like me, though female...perhaps, you would carry on where I shall leave off?

And, you know why that is.

Before I close, I know you will know when that moment comes. I know what you are. I have been your protector for many years now...I will continue to be that, never fear, my precious...I will always be with you.

Where you go, my darling, I too, will go. These are my words that I cannot speak aloud to you...they would not understand...as we do...they would shun you as quickly as if you had committed a heinous sin. And what sin could you possibly commit?

The sin of...

...love.

And that is what I feel for you. And have always felt for you. Yes, despite what I am, despite all that I have done...despite the names they call me...I can, and do, feel love. I know what it is. Yet, I have never been given the kind of love, that transcends all...that cares nothing for what others say of it...that bewitches all that it touches.

Until you.

A curious word...bewitch. You have done that to me. Bewitched me. Ensnared my heart...what spell did you use upon me, my love? My little witch...yes, I told you I know what you are...

...is there a spell you could weave...one that only you know of...that could save me from my Fate? From my appointed destiny?

You know what that is.

And you will cry over me once more...and they will wonder why your tears are far more bitter then those of a mere family member...why your tears will not cease...

They will wonder why.

But you'll know why.

I would like my last memory to be of you. That my last thought, vision, would be of you...but will it be? I have heard that one thinks so many curious and strange things when one is about to...

Die.

You know I will. I see you weeping now. Know that I am not afraid to die...as you should not be. I taught you enough to know better, my dear...death is only a beginning. Perhaps we will be together in another place and time? Let us hope and pray for that.

And now...I shall close this...I haven't much time left to me, as we leave at first light, and I wish to have this off to you as quickly as is possible. It may not reach you in time...I know it shall not...but I want you to know, to remember, to always carry it with you...

I love you.

Always, now and forever...

I love you.

Never forget that, my precious. Never.

Sincerely and with high respect, I am yours...

William.'

letter enclosed from unknown captain to Lady Waltham-Tavington with only one phrase...

"I regret to inform you...Colonel William Tavington...was lost. Our deepest sympathy is yours."

'You know why...I love you...where you go, I too, shall go...' -William.


End file.
